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notmytime: (Default)
2015-09-11 10:21 pm

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i have many different kakashi accounts, if you want one in particular, feel free to specify!

[personal profile] notmytime - canon, typically pre-team 7 but happy to do mid/post team 7 or younger too!
[personal profile] withoutsight - hokage kakashi, but blind. an AU where kakashi kept his double sharingan but they deteriorated, resulting in blindness.
[personal profile] turningpages - modern teacher AU.
[personal profile] nakamagoroshi - ANBU.
[personal profile] amicicider - alt canon.
[personal profile] burningexample - young kakashi, aged anywhere from 5-12.





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threads
a sudden slip - kakashi/roy mustang nsfw
bed sharing - kakashi/adrian (oc) nsfw
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coffee shop - teacher!kakashi & tenten
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notmytime: (Default)
1990-07-26 12:13 pm
Entry tags:

info/permissions

old headcanon post






☄ general info

♚ CHARACTER: hatake kakashi
♚ SERIES: naruto: shippuden
♚ PULL POINT: during the middle of shippuden, where his team 7 is being looked after by yamato and he is free to fuck around and do basically whatever he wants. shirking responsibilities is where his true talent lies. (if you'd like a different pull point for a PSL, let me know!!)
♚ AGE: 30 (if above)
♚ BIRTHDAY: sep 15
♚ HEIGHT/BUILD: he's 5'9" and decently built because he's a shinobi, but because he's tall he looks kind of willowy. like he's been stretched out.
♚ LANGUAGE: konoha & the shinobi world has similarities to japan but strictly Isn't japan, but.. it's a japanese series so lets just say he speaks/reads japanese. he knows sign-language and probably is passable in english, but he'll have an accent.

☄ first impressions

♚ VISUAL: normal | post-series look | sharingan
♚ NOTABLE FEATURES: kakashi has a massive scar running down his face and right down his left eye; which is a sharingan. he can only use it sparingly, though, so he keeps it hidden. he's covered in scars, particularly around his fingers and hands, and has very light body hair. under his mask he has a very plain but pretty face, with full lips and a beauty mark below his lip.
♚ FASHION: when he isn't in his jounin blues, kakashi wears a series of buttoned shirts under sweaters, plain trousers; kind of a teacher/librarian vibe. he just likes to be comfy. he always wears his mask except for at home.
♚ DEMEANOUR: pretty quiet and pleasant, often not getting involved in conversations unless he knows a person, doesn't like to be the center of attention and is VERY reluctant to be forced into positions of power (he doesn't want to be a teacher, or a captain in the war, or the hokage, but somehow ends up being all three!!) has a violent streak and a tendancy to mope. he has a dirty mind but flusters easily. likes to gently tease. he cares way too much, and he's a bit of a crybaby. very intelligent, sometimes to a fault.
♚ AURAL: voice clip; kakashi has a very low and measured voice, it's often quiet and gentle. even when he shouts, it's not particularly gravelly.
♚ OLFACTORY: kakashi smells like dogs (he has nine of them) and ozone.
♚ MENTAL INFORMATION: if a telapath were to scan his brain they'd find a mind working way too fast; kakashi is constantly aware of ALL of his surroundings, everyone around him and who might be looking at him/who might be a threat/who might be worth talking to. autism at it's finest, baby. if you were to scan any deeper, you might see a few tragic scenes from his past that he tries not to think about or let affect him too badly - if you're cross-canon and want to look in there, PM me and we can discuss!!
♚ MAGICAL INFORMATION: kakashi has chakra which runs around his body like veins, and enables him to do all his ninja jutsu. his aura is probably bright and crackling like lightning, but there is a darker edge to it that comes from the fact that kakashi has and can kill people in cold blood.

☄ OOC

♚ BACKTAGGING: i love backtagging, please lets go mad and spend months tagging till we've worn the proverbial carpets down!
♚ FOURTHWALLING: go for it. kakashi will probably ignore it and figure you're being odd.
♚ PHYSICAL AFFECTION: unless he knows you pretty well, kakashi probably won't be comfortable with it and will push you off. if he knows your character decently well, he might allow a hug. if he's in a relationship with someone, only then does he get a little more touchy feely.
♚ PHYSICAL VIOLENCE: kakashi is reluctant to spar with partners and will often do anything to either cut it off early or avoid it entirely. if a student has asked to spar he'll be very annoying and usually have his hands in his pockets the whole time.
♚ RELATIONSHIPS: M/M preferred - i can do M/F with kakashi if needed, but we'll need to talk about it first. cross-canon or canon is fine.
i usually play kakashi asexual but for romance i can handwave it! kakashi usually has less experience than a 30 year old man would, from being a skittish ninja and all.

notmytime: (Default)
1990-04-30 09:23 pm
Entry tags:

open catch all top level








comment for a top-level or leave me something here!

feel free to check my current meme top levels for inspo and post here instead, too!


notmytime: (Default)
1980-05-07 08:44 pm

playlist




SCARECROW

oh scarecrow, it ain't so bad. just try and fit in this hollow man. 'cause you've traveled so far from where it all began..

maybe i wasn't made for this world... all the space in between the soul and the seams. maybe i wasn't made for this world.

i think i took the wrong path, and i need to find my way back. they say you're never too far to start it all again.

... am i too far?

oh, scarecrow.. oh, scarecrow. is it really that bad?

AT LEAST WE'RE DREAMING

live in an apartment that bums me out, it don't get better when the lights go out. waitin' for someone to come along and find me.

at least i'm breathing, at least i'm alive. as long as i'm dreaming, everything's gonna be alright.

i'm alright, i tell myself twice in the mirror before i can't go to sleep at night.
i need a lullaby, i need some time, i need to find my way back home.

MILLSTONE

i used to be such a burning example. i used to be so original. i used to care, i was being cared for, made sure i showed it to those that i loved.
i used to sleep without a single stir, cause i was about my fathers work.

take me out tonight, this ship of fools will sink. i'm my own stone about my neck.

be my breath, there's nothing i wouldn't give.

i was the glue that kept my friends together. now they don't talk and we don't go out.

never hit the breaks, there's no time to save him. he just ran out on the street. anybody know his name? i think i recognize him.
he sure as hell paid for that mistake.

THE GOOD TIMES ARE KILLING ME

got dirt, got air, got water and i know you can carry on. shrug off shortsighted false excitement, and oh what can i say? have one, have twenty one "one mores", and oh it does not relent.

the good times are killing me.

jaws clenched tight, we talked all night oh but what did we say?

enough hair of the dog to make myself an entire rug.

the good times are killing me.

LANDFILL

throw me in the landfill, don't think about the consequences. throw me in the dirt pit, don't think about the choices that you made. throw me in the water, don't think about the splash i will create.

leave me at the altar, knowing all the things you have escaped.

don't you dare look back, walk away, catch up with the sunrise.

'cause this is torturous electricity between all of us, and this is dangerous. cause i want you so much. but i hate your guts.

so leave me in the cold, wait until the snow covers me up so i cannot move. so i'm just embedded in the frost. then leave me in the rain, wait until my clothes cling to my frame.

wipe away your tear stains, thought you said you didn't feel pain.

EVERYBODY'S CHANGING

you're aching, you're breaking and i can see the pain in your eyes; says everybody's changing and i don't know why.

so little time, try to understand that i'm trying to make a move just to stay in the game. i'm trying to stay awake and remember my name but everybody's changing...

and i don't feel the same.

PARDON ME

a decade ago, i never thought i would be twenty-three on the verge of spontaneous combustion, woe-is-me. but i guess that it comes with the territory - an ominous landscape of never-ending calamity.

i need you to hear, i need you to see that i've had all i can take. and exploding seems like a definite possibility to me.

ADMIRATION

could you move in slow motion? everything goes by so fast. just slow down a little, save the best part for last.

you speak in riddles, your intentions turn me on. i'm yours forever, will you love me when i'm gone?

you're an unfenced fire... over walls we've trampled.. it's you i admire..

your eyes are an uncovered ocean, far away. any minute now.
don't get ahead of me.
could we just this once see eye to eye?

could you want, perhaps, me?

SECRETS

i need another story, something to get off my chest. my life gets kind of boring, need something that i can confess. 'til all my sleeves are stained red, from all the truth that i've said. come by it honestly, i swear.

thought you saw me weak, no. i've been on the brink.

so tell me what you want to hear, something that'll light those ears. sick of all the insincere, i'm gonna give all my secrets away.

this time, don't need another perfect lie.

my god, amazing how we got this far. it's like we're chasing all those stars..

got no reason, got no shame, got no family i can blame.
just don't let me disappear, i'm gonna tell you everything.

DARK SIDE OF ME

in those discouraging days, i always missed the mark. when we were comfort and close, i would neglect to keep you safe and unexposed.

a portrait of time repeats this moment i replaced with an empty wish to give; i give, i gave..

i gave my everything for all the wrong things. in this cold reality i made this selfish war machine.
oh, this has become hell. how can i share this life with someone else? i promise you, there is no weight that can bury us under the ghost of all my guilt..

here in the dark side of me.

now in your absence i wade through the coursing lonely, lost. and in this tragic dismay, i never could believe what i became.

oh, i couldn't give you what you needed. it's all my fault. too coward to believe i lost it all.

BLINDED

just an old friend coming over now to visit you, and that's what i've become. i let myself in though i know i'm not supposed to, but.. i never know when i'm done.

or stay and let the day just fade away. in wild dedication, take the moment of hope and let it run.
never look back at all the damage we have done now, to each other..

when i see you, it's like i'm staring down the sun and i'm blinded - there's nothing left to do. but still i see you.

i've never believed that things happen for a reason, and they never go as planned. i wanted to thank you for a vision that was lost, that you returned. but you passed, do you understand?

i fall down on what to say - oh something clean, let me be clever.
"hey, oh well, whatever" but that's not what i mean!

where we've been has left us burned, still i won't turn now from a fight you know i'll never win.

when i see you, you know all the things i've done. and i'm blinded, like i'm staring down the sun.

time it passes and it tells us what we're left with. we become the things we do.
me? i'm a fool spent from defiance, yeah you got me, but... i didn't give up on you.


icarus is not a tshirt or a swan song, no. he is born again. and it's not easy being me, but i can promise i will mend or bend when when you believe that we are fixed from our birth - and i've just fallen back to earth still you know i'll try again.

'cause i believe that we are lucky, we are golden, we are stolen manners in the days when we are one.

so when i see you, in spite of all that we've become, i'm still blinded like i'm staring down the sun.

I WOULDN'T MIND

merrily we fall, out of line, out of line. i'd fall anywhere with you, i'm by your side.

we're not going anywhere until we freeze.

carefully we'll place our destiny, you came and you took this heart and set it free. every word you write or say is warmth to me. i'm torn to be right where you are.

tell me everyday i get to wake up to that smile. i wouldn't mind it at all.

you know me, pinch me gently, i can hardly breathe.

THE SHARKS AND THE CROWS

we climbed the highest mountains, it's like we've seen every line of the planet.

i said i'd bring you everywhere, seems like i kept my promise. that's what you deserve, my friend.

we drew our names in the snow, crossed oceans on a sailboat. we were two kids that never wanted to grow old.

we played the most dangerous games... exchanged the blood from our veins.

we had been on our knees, we've drunk the strongest whiskeys. we've lived much more than we expected to live.

sure things could have been better, my friends have started to whisper, and you have a wife and children.
we were friends on the revert, we celebrate life together and something tells me we won't live forever.

we've seen the stars and the smoke, and the sharks and the crows...

that's why i miss you, you know?
ANGELS AND DARLAS

it muse have been in september, when swiftly we leapt from buildings, waiting for the perfect kill. and your eyes got crimson when you got closer.

and you might be the nicest thing i've ever seen.

...in time we'll be syndicated too. but for now, there's not a door that you can close and we can't creep through.

you might be the nicest thing i've ever seen, ever seen.
LOW

tear those pictures off the wall, i don't think i will need them all again. i think the problem here is there's nothing wrong, i guess that i can coast along for now.

little bit, little more. there's something missing, i'm missing the point i did before.

i'm sorry that i'm always the one to let you down again.

i feel so ashamed, this should have been easy. (i feel so low)
and i want you to know that i won't let go again.

you were the first to knock me down, in a way i guess we're even now. and i know i only used that first to justify but maybe that's not just a lie, who knows.

i feel so tired, tired...
HONEST, I'LL WAIT

whatever gets you through your worries. affection that you feel, the pain inside your skin can bury.

if this road you take is three times luckier, the earth is going to shake and the restless souls will come for you.

honest, i'll wait. till the wave crashes over me. in wide open space, your sound fills the rest of me.

no matter how hard i try, i can't escape this way i'm feeling.
LOVELY

you say things with your mouth, flies and cobwebs come out. i hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow. luckily i can read your mind, flies and cobwebs unwind.

they will not take you down, they will not cast you out.

dear friend, here we are again pretending to understand how you think your world is ending. sending signals and red flags in waves, it's hard to tell the difference between blood and water these days.

i pray that one day you see that the only difference between life and dying is one is trying, that's all we're called to do.
so try to love me and i'll try to save you.

won't you stay alive? i'll take you on a ride. i will make you believe you are lovely.
EVERLASTING FRIEND

a heartbeat skip, relationship, inside a bubble bath. an icing drip below your lip so we undo the math. a sudden slip between my pathetic sedatives.. a real life script of how mistakes became our medicine.

delay the hurtful words of complicated overcast.
please take the message that i'm picking up my chin at last.
my confidence grows stronger when you're next to me, but we pray from miles away in quest for what we long to be.

i might crumble, i might take a fall again (still missing you).
but you're my everlasting friend.

a heartbeat skip, relationship, so we would stay up late. a teardrop drip below your lip... a sudden slip from where we used to be a year ago - a real life script of how our hands would hold and not let go.

i just want to know that you'll be coming home.
PERFECT

if the point is to never disappoint you, somebody's got to tell me what to do.
just wish you could've seen me when it used to come so easy. i'd like to say that it's easy to stay, but it's not for me. 'cause i'm barely here at all.

slow down now, the secret's out.. and i swear, now, everything is perfect.
what you want, what you need has been killing me. trying to be everything that you want me to be.
i'll say yes, i'll undress, i've done more for less.
now i'll change everything till it's perfect again.

coming down, coming around, giving a frown when i hit ground. i hate the way that i say i should stay when i know that i don't give a fuck about it anyway.

i think it's better this way, this is good in a bad way. it's better this way. i'll make this perfect again!
TAUTOU

.... i'm sinking like a stone in the sea. i'm burning like a bridge for your body .... (i'm sinking like a stone...)
IN THE BLOOD

how can you be so warm? how can you know what i feel? it's the way you move your hands, and it's the way you understand.

and that's the reason that i'm asking. that's the reason that i want to know.

how can you throw away everything you live for?

too many lost, links in a chain passed down through the years but ending here if we just face the pain and the fear.

who did you love before? who did they love before you?
UNSATISFIED

ten out of ten for a race already run, bleeding the world 'cause you can't figure out what's wrong. so come back down from your daydream high, lost for words when you sympathize, there's a million ways to believe you tried...

well i'm unsatisfied.
just sick and tired of all i've tried.
CHAMELEON BOY

i changed my color for you, i shed my coat with caution, i lack the beauty you display. see here there are the bruises, and some were self infliced, and some showed up along the way.

so i nod my head, i'm ready for the world to see the secret i kept here inside; the man you thought i'd be.

slip into coma calm, the coma where i calm myself down.

here comes excuses... why i let you down.

so now we've come upon the hardest thing i've ever done. it's telling you that i'm a mess.
what sort of mess? i mean, the self destructive gasoline.. the kind that strips you of your best. and while i play instead the way that most would end up dead, you sleep alone at home and wish that i was back in bed. with this i'm telling you my color changes back to blue.

how do i ask you this... will you help me through?
I WANT TO KNOW YOUR PLANS

i want to know your plans, and how involved in them i am. when you leave for good this fall will i be forgiven?

and if you want roses, i'll buy a bouquet. if that just won't cut it.. what can i say?

you're what keeps me believing this worlds not bone-dead. strength in my bones and the words in my head. they pour onto paper, it's all for you... cause that's what you do.

i want to know your fears, and if you'll forget me next year. when the jets go up and out will our hearts stay here? if you could forgive me for being so brash, you could hit me or whip me, and savor each lash.

... no more fighting. it is only a waste of our time.
I NEED SOME SLEEP

i need some sleep, i can't go on like this. i tried counting sheep, but there's one i always miss.

everyone says i'm getting down too low.
everyone says "you just gotta let it go.."

i need some sleep, time to put the old horse down. i'm in too deep and the wheels keep spinning round.
FEVER DREAMLESS

there's reasons for these bags under my eyes. it's effort i don't give except in lies. maybe it's the weight of all the promises i can't keep. but the universe will not let me sleep.

let's talk about the time that i waste. all the things i say i'd do but only say - and nothing was done today, but i still feel i shouldn't be awake.

exhausted from the same old grievance, another day another moral inconvenience. and who would bat an eye while the world around them dies? and who could? i can't seem to close mine.

i wish that we weren't forced to find out, i wish we never knew what this was about.

there's reasons we fall so far so fast, and reasons why the pluses never last. and rest is the world's best advice. but the universe would kill me if i tried.

the time still passes and i wait. there's still so much left to do when i'm awake. and i've now lost track of days in just one night.

i've long forgotten what dreams feel like, another sleep, another eon lost from daylight. and who would lend a word? it's more than just absurd. and i think this can't be too much worse.

the stars have gone dark and i'm shaking. no questions why i deserve anything.

there's a reason why we fell so far so fast. reasons why the pluses never last. i take my own thoughts with a grain of salt. when i tell myself that this is all my fault.

grant me a fever dream, at least.
PUSH

hey, don't you feel it now? am i shiny side down. hey, burning brighter still and you're getting sick, and you're feeling it.

it'll wear you down and wear you down. you chase it, breathing in and out and in and out. they'll push you up against the wall, against the wall.

you didn't think you'd feel at all but you were wrong...
about it.

it started with a handgun, loaded with excuses. i started faking it, and then we started breaking it, all the pieces used to fit.

i regretted it. i regret a lot of things.
UNKNOWN SOLDIER

border line, dead inside. i don't mind, falling to pieces.

count me in, violent. let's begin, feeding the sickness. how do i simplify? dislocate. the enemy's on the way.

show me what it's like to dream in black and white, so i can leave this world tonight.

full of fear, ever clear. i'll be here, fighting forever.

curious, venomous. you'll find me climbing to heaven. never mind, turn back time. you'll be fine, i will get left behind.

holding on too tight, breathe the breath of life, so i can leave this world tonight.
CANDLES

i'm scared i'll be torn apart by a wolf in a mask, a familiar name on a birthday card.

blow out the candles, blow out the candles.
just a young heart, confusing my mind, but we're both in silence. wide-eyed, both in silence, wide-eyed like we're in a crime scene.

well, i have brittle bones it seems. i bite my tongue and torch my dreams.

things cannot be reversed, we learn from times we are cursed. things cannot be reversed, learn from the ones we fear the worst and the ones we hate the most.
MICHIGAN

the clouds move over pontiac skies, their silent thunder matches mine. i know this feeling from long ago, i wonder if it's gone now i know..

so when she calls don't send her my way, when it hurts you'll know it's the right thing.

you took the words right out of my mouth when you knew that i would need them.

what am i supposed to do now, without you... without you.

it's unannounced like you'd expected among broke down break lines...

and all that's left is a blind reflection, but you know what's coming and you regret it.

so when she comes don't send her my way, when it hurts most it's the right thing...
STOMACH TIED IN KNOTS

the problem isn't you its me, i know, i can tell. i've seen it time after time, and i'll push you away. i get so afraid.

and i can't live without you now. i can't even live with myself.

i only have myself to blame.. but do you think we could start again?

POKE

poke at my iris, why can't i cry about this? maybe there is something that you know that i don't...
we adopt a brand new language, communicate through pursed lips....

i might never catch a mouse, and present it in my mouth, to make you feel you're with someone who deserves to be with you.

if you don't want to be with me just say and i will go.

well we can change our partners, this is a progressive dance but remember it was me who dragged you up to the sweaty floor.

well this has been a reel, i've got shin-splints and a stitch, but like a drunken night it's the best bits that are coloured in.

you should look through some old photos, i adored you in every one of those. if someone took a picture of us now they'd need to be told, that we had ever clung and tied a navy knot with arms at night.

but i hate when i feel like this, and i never hated you.
TO BE ALONE WITH YOU

i'd swim across lake michigan, i'd sell my shoes. i'd give my body to be back again, in the rest of the room.

to be alone with you.

you gave your body to the lonely, they took your clothes. you gave up a wife and a family, you gave your ghost.

to be alone with me.

i've never known a man who loved me.
WARMEST PART OF THE WINTER

come inside, you are hungry for sleep. you are the warmest part of the winter. when i was young i made a plan that i would never break myself.

lift the shade and let some light in the room, we don't see the sun anymore. i've been told i gave my soul to live my days for someone else.

tell me you love me but don't say it with words, i wanna feel your body around me. and twenty years of push and pull have left you searchin' for a name.

but maybe i have come here to die, to watch the life go out of my body. take apart the ugly days and you will never see the sun.
LITTLE HELL

what if i can't be all that you need me to be? we've got a good thing going, we have some promises to keep. but my addiction it can be such a detriment. please believe in this, my dear.. i am more than penitent.

what if everything's just the way that it will be? could it be that i am meant to cause you all this grief? my warships are lying off the coast of your delicate heart. and my aim is steady and true, as it's been right from the start.

there's a degree of difficulty in dealing with me. from my haunted past comes the daunting task of living through memories. if we could just hang a mirror on the bedroom wall, stare into the past and forget it all..
WONDERWALL

all the roads we have to walk are winding, and all the lights that lead us there are blinding. there are many things that i would like to say to you, but i don't know how.

'cause maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me
and after all, you're my wonderwall

by now you shoulda realised what you've gotta do
i don't believe that anybody feels the way i do about you now.
ALWAYS IN YOUR HEAD

let yourself down, let yourself down, pull yourself together. always afraid of choices that you make, but you and i know better. i have seen the spark, i have seen the spark still alive inside your heart. i have seen the fire, i have seen the fire at the heart of your desire.

i am always in your head, always in your head, you've gotta let me go. let me go.

waiting on a sign, for the heavens to align, waiting on an answer - what are you waiting for?

lie to your friends and foes, lie when you're on your own, till the lie is all that matters. all the cons and pros, will not support the weight of your regrets when you grow old.

now is not the time to be afraid, or the time to run away, or the time to hide your face under those covers. fear is a prison cell and you know damn well that if you listen to him whisper he'll ride your coat tails all the way down to the bottom.

keep holding on, and hold your head high
it's not the end if it's not all alright.
COLD IS THE NIGHT

cold is the night without you here, just your absence ringing in my ears. hard is the heart that feels no fear. without the bad the good disappears.

long is the road that leads me home, and longer still when i walk alone. bitter is the thought of all that time, spent searching for something i'll never find.

take this burden away from me, and bury it before it buries me.

many are the days i've wanted to cease, lay myself down and find some relief. heavy is the head that gets no sleep. we carry our lives around in our memories.

take away this apathy, and bury it before it buries me.

steady is the hand that's come to terms, with the lessons it has had to learn. i've seen the things that i must do, but lord, this road is meant for two. so i'm waiting here for you.

take my hand and set me free, take my burdens and bury them deep. take my burden away from me, and bury it before, bury it before, bury it before it buries me.
 

notmytime: (Default)
1980-05-07 08:42 pm
Entry tags:

ic contact

kakashi gif

 
Sorry, I'm not here right now. I must have took a wrong turn.
I'll be back soon but in the mean time, leave me a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

notmytime: (Default)
1980-05-07 08:41 pm
Entry tags:

headcanon

the below is stuff i wrote years ago, not incorrect but dated. tldr; kakashi is a sad old man who needs a hug and a good distraction from his trauma. your typical disaster asexual, but let me know if your character wants to bang bc i can handwave or go vague on that front.




a nervous tic or habit they do

Kakashi doesn't really get nervous, and when he does he resolutely doesn't let it show. He'll feel it tight in his stomach, curling somewhere at the base of his ribs and hot in the palms of his hands... But his expression and posture will stay firm. The only sign he's not 100% will be in the smallest twitch of his eyebrow(s - depending on whether or not his headband is pushed up to reveal his other eye).
As for any habits - it's very rare to see him without his arms folded or his hands in his pockets. He also has a habit of side-eyeing in conversations rather than looking directly at people. Make of that what you will.


describetheir usual smile

Given that this man's face is pretty much constantly covered with a mask, his usual smile is always shown in his eyes. He has two typical smiles - the first is the gentle smile you can see in the way his mask bunches at his nose and small creases appear either side of his eyes, and the second is a big smile, usually seen when he's laughing, where his eyes close into crescents.
Unmasked, his smiles are muted depending on who he's around. His typical unmasked smile is the big grin only his friends see; a flash of teeth and sometimes even a bark of laughter.


do they look up or down while thinking?

Outside of battle Kakashi looks to the sky while brooding thinking.
In battle, he's always got a thousand thoughts working at once and can't afford to take his eyes off the enemy, so it depends where his target is.


describe their usual sleeping position

Kakashi sleeps on his back, usually with an arm or hand over his face despite whether or not he's wearing his sleep-mask.


describe something they like without naming it

-      The paper is worn and used, folded and scuffed in places and nicked about the spine. Though the item is precious, the signs of wear are signs of love.
-      He brings it to his lips, letting the molten heat ooze through his palms and down his throat. The sharp, clean feeling of it settles the ache behind his eyes, in his joints and in his chest. He sighs, content.
-     The movements are quick and precise and he meets each one head on, fighting through till the conclusion; will it be a win or a loss today?



what's their posture like in a normal situation?


Absolutely bored out of his mind. He keeps up a very sturdy facade of complete disinterest when in actuality he's paying the utmost attention. So that's his hands in his pockets or propped on his hips, or his arms folded, with his spine kind of crunched forwards in a lazy slouch. It's not rare to find him finding every opportunity to lean on something, either.


describe their hands

Kakashi has very interesting hands. They are a little too long in the fingers, bent and kind of crooked at the knuckles and ultimately much too gentle looking to belong to a male shinobi.
The skin of his right hand is a little more weathered and the veins protrude more visibly from his skin, from the long-term use of his chidori. On this hand also, the palm is much rougher than the other one.


✜ how would their hair gray? or would they lose their hair first?


Uhhhh... About that.



Yes, his hair is already gray/silver. He's been an old man since birth. As for going bald, Kakashi will never lose his hair - have you seen this mane? It might get thinner or shorter somewhere down the line - if he lives that long - but he'll definitely never lose it all. I think he'd put himself down before that happened.


describe how they show affection.

Kakashi is all about the little things, but he has to feel in control when showing affection otherwise he'll get overwhelmed and run away.
Kind of like a baby deer.
Platonic affection is probably the easiest for him. If he's friendly with you he'll probably put a hand on your shoulder or pat your back should the conversation or greeting warrant it. He likes hugs as much as the next guy but they don't usually last too long unless the person is very close to him.
Romantically, Kakashi prefers to be in control of the pace, so he'd start off with gifts or a more meaningful smile - move on to soft touches of his fingers, a gentle hand hold, maybe letting someone hold his arm.. It would take a lot of patience for him to willingly de-mask and kiss someone.

If we're talking non-physical affection then it's all in the way he talks to a person. He's a pretty friendly guy, and if he feels comfortable enough to make jokes and be silly then you know you've got him to like you. If he sticks at polite then... Well, he doesn't hate you but he probably doesn't consider you a friend.


what is one of their favorite items?

Kakashi has an old high-pile rug beside his bed. It's the first thing he latches onto when he throws his legs out of bed in the morning and it always manages to reel him into dealing with his day head-on, somehow.



☾ - sleep headcanon:
Kakashi doesn't dream. Most of the time he sees blackness while he sleeps; anything else is a nightmare

★ - sad headcanon:
Kakashi is starting to look so much like his father, people won't stop telling him so. It hurts more every time he's reminded.

☆ - happy headcanon
Kakashi is satisfied with his life as it is. He has good friends, good food and a job he's good at. What is there to complain about?

☠ - angry/violent headcanon
If Kakashi feels he's done anything wrong, he always craves physical punishment in the form of pushing a sparring/training session or mission within an inch of his life. It's destructive and dangerous, but it's all he feels he can do to refrain from exploding.

✿ - sex headcanon
Kakashi is a virgin. Yep.
His reluctance to get close to people means that he's never let anyone in that close, not even for a one night stand. He's always been too focused on his mission and his objectives to fool around and has never thought about romance or sex when it comes to his personal experience. If it's brought up he usually just vaguely shrugs it off. If advances are made and they aren't on his own terms then he could get either vaguely flustered or angry, and will inevitably escape somehow.
Though, he gets all his sex ed from Minato and Icha Icha, I doubt anyone would wanna have sex with him anyway.

■ -  Bedroom/house/living quarters headcanon

 
He lives in an apartment typical of a shinobi. He could move out, but he's much too lazy. He keeps the walls pretty bare, and it's reasonably devoid of furniture. He doesn't really see the point in splashing out when he's barely home.

He's surprisingly very tidy and clean and has absolutely no problems donning a feather duster and pinny to do the spring cleaning.
In fact he kind of enjoys it.


♡ - romantic headcanon
Kakashi is a huge romantic at heart. No-one expects it because of how secluded and gruff he can appear on the outside but he's soft goo when it comes to romance stories and tales of true love. If someone gave him flowers or wrote him a poem he'd probably struggle to keep nonchalant about it.
That said, however, he struggles with his own romantic feelings. He won't act on them unless goaded or encouraged into it, and even then he spends most of his time second-guessing himself.
It would take someone very patient and understanding to secure Kakashi in a functioning romantic relationship.

♥ - family headcanon
Kakashi is an orphan, so he now thinks of the people closest to him as his family - or, like the wolf boy he is, his pack. The people who stick with him and care about him, he counts as his family.

☮ - friendship headcanon

Kakashi is 100% loyal to his friends. They are the reason he's alive and the reason he continues to fight to be so.
Kakashi puts barriers up between himself and everyone he meets, and while it's true that he does it to protect himself and his own feelings it's also true that he does it almost like a test. He wants to see who'll be bothered to climb over those barriers to get closer, and if they'll run from what they discover inside him.. Those that don't, he knows are true friends he should keep.

♦ - quirks/hobbies headcanon
(Quirks taken from/inspired by [
x])
- is extremely superstitious: Those excuses he gives in the morning aren't entirely false! He honestly doesn't like crossing black cats or chancing his luck with ladders/salt/cracks in the pavement.
- only has a limited number of outfits: Being a shinobi he's usually wearing his uniform, of course. When it comes to casual clothing, he just goes with his uniform sans his flak jacket. He owns a couple of civilian outfits but he has no idea where he put them, or if they'll still fit. The only vaguely civilian thing he owns is his pajamas; a classic set of cotton shirt and pants.
- doodles on everything: Yep, if it has some clear page space then it's very probable that Kakashi will end up doodling on it. Reports to the Hokage, napkins, official documents, you name it.
- enjoys word puzzles
- is always reading: Duuuh..
- loves board games
- plays poker
- randomly wanders around/gets lost when bored
- sings well: Kakashi doesn't exactly sing, he mostly hums or sings lightly under his breath. It's always very quiet, but he has a decent voice.
- doesn't drink: He mostly doesn't drink because when he does he gets affectionate and then sad. And no-one wants to deal with him being like that, especially him.
- has tea in the afternoon: He will have tea at any and all opportunities.
- has a large visible scar: Again, duhhh.
- lives only with required furniture
- cracks neck/back/knuckles
- has terrible handwriting: Here is an [
example].
- is an incredibly slow walker: When he wants to be. He dawdles an awful lot when he has nothing else to do.
- is extremely ticklish: In a specific place. That no-one will ever discover. 8|
- whistles
- taps foot when bored/nervous
- winks without realising: HAHA, GET IT? BECAUSE HE ALWAYS COVERS ONE EYE? HAHA.
- has decent sleep pattern: When he can get one. He's a lot more likely to get -3 hours.
- gives the vaguest possible answer to questions: Usually on purpose.
- doesn't talk much: Kakashi is much more a listener than he is a talker.
- goes off on tangents regularly
- likes to gossip
- plays dumb
- sees a dirty/sexual reference in everything
- spaces out and stares when someone is talking for a while

▼ - childhood headcanon
Kakashi is well aware he used to be an absolute little brat who took too many people for granted, and he regrets a lot of the things he did as a child.

∇ -. old age/aging headcanon
Kakashi would actually, one day, like to retire. Maybe even with a family.
However, he knows it would be difficult to not be a shinobi anymore, so it's kind of a pipe dream.

♒ - cooking/food headcanon
Kakashi is average with cooking. He has a lot of hits and misses, often burning or overcooking whatever he makes. He usually resorts to having his meals in restaurants or making very plain and simple meals that are very hard to mess up.




▶   Do they have any daily rituals?
Kakashi's daily rituals can be pretty mundane and because his line of work can be pretty unpredictable, most of his routines are domestic ones; he wakes, washes, shaves and always makes himself tea in the morning. He makes a point of visiting the memorial stone at some point during every day, and though the time fluctuates it's always a thing that happens without fail. He also visits various but specific graves at this time.

▶   Do they exercise, and if so what do they do? How often?
As a shinobi it's expected of Kakashi to maintain a certain level of physical fitness. H
e gets most of his excercise on missions, but in the rare chance that he feels a little out of shape he can be found taking part in regular sparring or practicing alone - usually with weapons of his choice, although he has been seen practicing taijutsu more often.

▶   What would they do if they needed to make dinner but the kitchen was busy?
Kakashi does
n't actually spend that much time in the kitchen. He typically takes long missions, so there's no point storing food that will go off in his cupboards. He has spices, rice, noodles - things that will last, but they're all bland and uninteresting, only to be used if he's desperate/lazy/poor. So if his kitchen was busy for whatever reason, he'd just go eat out or scrounge some food from his friends, haha.

▶   Cleanliness habits - personal, workspace etc.
Kakashi can't stand wearing the same clothes for longer than he has to. He has the training required for long, covert missions and knows how to keep himself hygienic and healthy while he's away, but nothing beats a shower and a clean set of duds. When he gets home from missions like that, his first thought is a shower. He doesn't like feeling sticky or gross or smelling bad - and this also extends to his personal space. His home isn't spotless - he's not obsessively clean - but everything is organized and tidy, if a little dusty.


-- WIP, to be continued.






notmytime: (Default)
1980-05-07 08:38 pm
Entry tags:

hows my driving?




HOW'S MY DRIVING?

Any feedback/comments about how I play Kakashi - negative or otherwise - or any questions?
Thread it below and I'll get back to you ASAP.
Constructive criticism appreciated. I also accept butt pats as legal tender.

ANON COMMENTING is ON.
IP LOGGING is OFF.
notmytime: (pic#9214524)
1980-05-07 08:30 pm

playlist




SCARECROW

oh scarecrow, it ain't so bad. just try and fit in this hollow man. 'cause you've traveled so far from where it all began..

maybe i wasn't made for this world... all the space in between the soul and the seams. maybe i wasn't made for this world.

i think i took the wrong path, and i need to find my way back. they say you're never too far to start it all again.

... am i too far?

oh, scarecrow.. oh, scarecrow. is it really that bad?

AT LEAST WE'RE DREAMING

live in an apartment that bums me out, it don't get better when the lights go out. waitin' for someone to come along and find me.

at least i'm breathing, at least i'm alive. as long as i'm dreaming, everything's gonna be alright.

i'm alright, i tell myself twice in the mirror before i can't go to sleep at night.
i need a lullaby, i need some time, i need to find my way back home.

MILLSTONE

i used to be such a burning example. i used to be so original. i used to care, i was being cared for, made sure i showed it to those that i loved.
i used to sleep without a single stir, cause i was about my fathers work.

take me out tonight, this ship of fools will sink. i'm my own stone about my neck.

be my breath, there's nothing i wouldn't give.

i was the glue that kept my friends together. now they don't talk and we don't go out.

never hit the breaks, there's no time to save him. he just ran out on the street. anybody know his name? i think i recognize him.
he sure as hell paid for that mistake.

THE GOOD TIMES ARE KILLING ME

got dirt, got air, got water and i know you can carry on. shrug off shortsighted false excitement, and oh what can i say? have one, have twenty one "one mores", and oh it does not relent.

the good times are killing me.

jaws clenched tight, we talked all night oh but what did we say?

enough hair of the dog to make myself an entire rug.

the good times are killing me.

LANDFILL

throw me in the landfill, don't think about the consequences. throw me in the dirt pit, don't think about the choices that you made. throw me in the water, don't think about the splash i will create.

leave me at the altar, knowing all the things you have escaped.

don't you dare look back, walk away, catch up with the sunrise.

'cause this is torturous electricity between all of us, and this is dangerous. cause i want you so much. but i hate your guts.

so leave me in the cold, wait until the snow covers me up so i cannot move. so i'm just embedded in the frost. then leave me in the rain, wait until my clothes cling to my frame.

wipe away your tear stains, thought you said you didn't feel pain.

EVERYBODY'S CHANGING

you're aching, you're breaking and i can see the pain in your eyes; says everybody's changing and i don't know why.

so little time, try to understand that i'm trying to make a move just to stay in the game. i'm trying to stay awake and remember my name but everybody's changing...

and i don't feel the same.

PARDON ME

a decade ago, i never thought i would be twenty-three on the verge of spontaneous combustion, woe-is-me. but i guess that it comes with the territory - an ominous landscape of never-ending calamity.

i need you to hear, i need you to see that i've had all i can take. and exploding seems like a definite possibility to me.

ADMIRATION

could you move in slow motion? everything goes by so fast. just slow down a little, save the best part for last.

you speak in riddles, your intentions turn me on. i'm yours forever, will you love me when i'm gone?

you're an unfenced fire... over walls we've trampled.. it's you i admire..

your eyes are an uncovered ocean, far away. any minute now.
don't get ahead of me.
could we just this once see eye to eye?

could you want, perhaps, me?

SECRETS

i need another story, something to get off my chest. my life gets kind of boring, need something that i can confess. 'til all my sleeves are stained red, from all the truth that i've said. come by it honestly, i swear.

thought you saw me weak, no. i've been on the brink.

so tell me what you want to hear, something that'll light those ears. sick of all the insincere, i'm gonna give all my secrets away.

this time, don't need another perfect lie.

my god, amazing how we got this far. it's like we're chasing all those stars..

got no reason, got no shame, got no family i can blame.
just don't let me disappear, i'm gonna tell you everything.

DARK SIDE OF ME

in those discouraging days, i always missed the mark. when we were comfort and close, i would neglect to keep you safe and unexposed.

a portrait of time repeats this moment i replaced with an empty wish to give; i give, i gave..

i gave my everything for all the wrong things. in this cold reality i made this selfish war machine.
oh, this has become hell. how can i share this life with someone else? i promise you, there is no weight that can bury us under the ghost of all my guilt..

here in the dark side of me.

now in your absence i wade through the coursing lonely, lost. and in this tragic dismay, i never could believe what i became.

oh, i couldn't give you what you needed. it's all my fault. too coward to believe i lost it all.

BLINDED

just an old friend coming over now to visit you, and that's what i've become. i let myself in though i know i'm not supposed to, but.. i never know when i'm done.

or stay and let the day just fade away. in wild dedication, take the moment of hope and let it run.
never look back at all the damage we have done now, to each other..

when i see you, it's like i'm staring down the sun and i'm blinded - there's nothing left to do. but still i see you.

i've never believed that things happen for a reason, and they never go as planned. i wanted to thank you for a vision that was lost, that you returned. but you passed, do you understand?

i fall down on what to say - oh something clean, let me be clever.
"hey, oh well, whatever" but that's not what i mean!

where we've been has left us burned, still i won't turn now from a fight you know i'll never win.

when i see you, you know all the things i've done. and i'm blinded, like i'm staring down the sun.

time it passes and it tells us what we're left with. we become the things we do.
me? i'm a fool spent from defiance, yeah you got me, but... i didn't give up on you.


icarus is not a tshirt or a swan song, no. he is born again. and it's not easy being me, but i can promise i will mend or bend when when you believe that we are fixed from our birth - and i've just fallen back to earth still you know i'll try again.

'cause i believe that we are lucky, we are golden, we are stolen manners in the days when we are one.

so when i see you, in spite of all that we've become, i'm still blinded like i'm staring down the sun.

I WOULDN'T MIND

merrily we fall, out of line, out of line. i'd fall anywhere with you, i'm by your side.

we're not going anywhere until we freeze.

carefully we'll place our destiny, you came and you took this heart and set it free. every word you write or say is warmth to me. i'm torn to be right where you are.

tell me everyday i get to wake up to that smile. i wouldn't mind it at all.

you know me, pinch me gently, i can hardly breathe.

THE SHARKS AND THE CROWS

we climbed the highest mountains, it's like we've seen every line of the planet.

i said i'd bring you everywhere, seems like i kept my promise. that's what you deserve, my friend.

we drew our names in the snow, crossed oceans on a sailboat. we were two kids that never wanted to grow old.

we played the most dangerous games... exchanged the blood from our veins.

we had been on our knees, we've drunk the strongest whiskeys. we've lived much more than we expected to live.

sure things could have been better, my friends have started to whisper, and you have a wife and children.
we were friends on the revert, we celebrate life together and something tells me we won't live forever.

we've seen the stars and the smoke, and the sharks and the crows...

that's why i miss you, you know?
ANGELS AND DARLAS

it muse have been in september, when swiftly we leapt from buildings, waiting for the perfect kill. and your eyes got crimson when you got closer.

and you might be the nicest thing i've ever seen.

...in time we'll be syndicated too. but for now, there's not a door that you can close and we can't creep through.

you might be the nicest thing i've ever seen, ever seen.
LOW

tear those pictures off the wall, i don't think i will need them all again. i think the problem here is there's nothing wrong, i guess that i can coast along for now.

little bit, little more. there's something missing, i'm missing the point i did before.

i'm sorry that i'm always the one to let you down again.

i feel so ashamed, this should have been easy. (i feel so low)
and i want you to know that i won't let go again.

you were the first to knock me down, in a way i guess we're even now. and i know i only used that first to justify but maybe that's not just a lie, who knows.

i feel so tired, tired...
HONEST, I'LL WAIT

whatever gets you through your worries. affection that you feel, the pain inside your skin can bury.

if this road you take is three times luckier, the earth is going to shake and the restless souls will come for you.

honest, i'll wait. till the wave crashes over me. in wide open space, your sound fills the rest of me.

no matter how hard i try, i can't escape this way i'm feeling.
LOVELY

you say things with your mouth, flies and cobwebs come out. i hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow. luckily i can read your mind, flies and cobwebs unwind.

they will not take you down, they will not cast you out.

dear friend, here we are again pretending to understand how you think your world is ending. sending signals and red flags in waves, it's hard to tell the difference between blood and water these days.

i pray that one day you see that the only difference between life and dying is one is trying, that's all we're called to do.
so try to love me and i'll try to save you.

won't you stay alive? i'll take you on a ride. i will make you believe you are lovely.
EVERLASTING FRIEND

a heartbeat skip, relationship, inside a bubble bath. an icing drip below your lip so we undo the math. a sudden slip between my pathetic sedatives.. a real life script of how mistakes became our medicine.

delay the hurtful words of complicated overcast.
please take the message that i'm picking up my chin at last.
my confidence grows stronger when you're next to me, but we pray from miles away in quest for what we long to be.

i might crumble, i might take a fall again (still missing you).
but you're my everlasting friend.

a heartbeat skip, relationship, so we would stay up late. a teardrop drip below your lip... a sudden slip from where we used to be a year ago - a real life script of how our hands would hold and not let go.

i just want to know that you'll be coming home.
PERFECT

if the point is to never disappoint you, somebody's got to tell me what to do.
just wish you could've seen me when it used to come so easy. i'd like to say that it's easy to stay, but it's not for me. 'cause i'm barely here at all.

slow down now, the secret's out.. and i swear, now, everything is perfect.
what you want, what you need has been killing me. trying to be everything that you want me to be.
i'll say yes, i'll undress, i've done more for less.
now i'll change everything till it's perfect again.

coming down, coming around, giving a frown when i hit ground. i hate the way that i say i should stay when i know that i don't give a fuck about it anyway.

i think it's better this way, this is good in a bad way. it's better this way. i'll make this perfect again!
TAUTOU

.... i'm sinking like a stone in the sea. i'm burning like a bridge for your body .... (i'm sinking like a stone...)
IN THE BLOOD

how can you be so warm? how can you know what i feel? it's the way you move your hands, and it's the way you understand.

and that's the reason that i'm asking. that's the reason that i want to know.

how can you throw away everything you live for?

too many lost, links in a chain passed down through the years but ending here if we just face the pain and the fear.

who did you love before? who did they love before you?
UNSATISFIED

ten out of ten for a race already run, bleeding the world 'cause you can't figure out what's wrong. so come back down from your daydream high, lost for words when you sympathize, there's a million ways to believe you tried...

well i'm unsatisfied.
just sick and tired of all i've tried.
CHAMELEON BOY

i changed my color for you, i shed my coat with caution, i lack the beauty you display. see here there are the bruises, and some were self infliced, and some showed up along the way.

so i nod my head, i'm ready for the world to see the secret i kept here inside; the man you thought i'd be.

slip into coma calm, the coma where i calm myself down.

here comes excuses... why i let you down.

so now we've come upon the hardest thing i've ever done. it's telling you that i'm a mess.
what sort of mess? i mean, the self destructive gasoline.. the kind that strips you of your best. and while i play instead the way that most would end up dead, you sleep alone at home and wish that i was back in bed. with this i'm telling you my color changes back to blue.

how do i ask you this... will you help me through?
I WANT TO KNOW YOUR PLANS

i want to know your plans, and how involved in them i am. when you leave for good this fall will i be forgiven?

and if you want roses, i'll buy a bouquet. if that just won't cut it.. what can i say?

you're what keeps me believing this worlds not bone-dead. strength in my bones and the words in my head. they pour onto paper, it's all for you... cause that's what you do.

i want to know your fears, and if you'll forget me next year. when the jets go up and out will our hearts stay here? if you could forgive me for being so brash, you could hit me or whip me, and savor each lash.

... no more fighting. it is only a waste of our time.
I NEED SOME SLEEP

i need some sleep, i can't go on like this. i tried counting sheep, but there's one i always miss.

everyone says i'm getting down too low.
everyone says "you just gotta let it go.."

i need some sleep, time to put the old horse down. i'm in too deep and the wheels keep spinning round.
FEVER DREAMLESS

there's reasons for these bags under my eyes. it's effort i don't give except in lies. maybe it's the weight of all the promises i can't keep. but the universe will not let me sleep.

let's talk about the time that i waste. all the things i say i'd do but only say - and nothing was done today, but i still feel i shouldn't be awake.

exhausted from the same old grievance, another day another moral inconvenience. and who would bat an eye while the world around them dies? and who could? i can't seem to close mine.

i wish that we weren't forced to find out, i wish we never knew what this was about.

there's reasons we fall so far so fast, and reasons why the pluses never last. and rest is the world's best advice. but the universe would kill me if i tried.

the time still passes and i wait. there's still so much left to do when i'm awake. and i've now lost track of days in just one night.

i've long forgotten what dreams feel like, another sleep, another eon lost from daylight. and who would lend a word? it's more than just absurd. and i think this can't be too much worse.

the stars have gone dark and i'm shaking. no questions why i deserve anything.

there's a reason why we fell so far so fast. reasons why the pluses never last. i take my own thoughts with a grain of salt. when i tell myself that this is all my fault.

grant me a fever dream, at least.
PUSH

hey, don't you feel it now? am i shiny side down. hey, burning brighter still and you're getting sick, and you're feeling it.

it'll wear you down and wear you down. you chase it, breathing in and out and in and out. they'll push you up against the wall, against the wall.

you didn't think you'd feel at all but you were wrong...
about it.

it started with a handgun, loaded with excuses. i started faking it, and then we started breaking it, all the pieces used to fit.

i regretted it. i regret a lot of things.
UNKNOWN SOLDIER

border line, dead inside. i don't mind, falling to pieces.

count me in, violent. let's begin, feeding the sickness. how do i simplify? dislocate. the enemy's on the way.

show me what it's like to dream in black and white, so i can leave this world tonight.

full of fear, ever clear. i'll be here, fighting forever.

curious, venomous. you'll find me climbing to heaven. never mind, turn back time. you'll be fine, i will get left behind.

holding on too tight, breathe the breath of life, so i can leave this world tonight.
CANDLES

i'm scared i'll be torn apart by a wolf in a mask, a familiar name on a birthday card.

blow out the candles, blow out the candles.
just a young heart, confusing my mind, but we're both in silence. wide-eyed, both in silence, wide-eyed like we're in a crime scene.

well, i have brittle bones it seems. i bite my tongue and torch my dreams.

things cannot be reversed, we learn from times we are cursed. things cannot be reversed, learn from the ones we fear the worst and the ones we hate the most.
MICHIGAN

the clouds move over pontiac skies, their silent thunder matches mine. i know this feeling from long ago, i wonder if it's gone now i know..

so when she calls don't send her my way, when it hurts you'll know it's the right thing.

you took the words right out of my mouth when you knew that i would need them.

what am i supposed to do now, without you... without you.

it's unannounced like you'd expected among broke down break lines...

and all that's left is a blind reflection, but you know what's coming and you regret it.

so when she comes don't send her my way, when it hurts most it's the right thing...
STOMACH TIED IN KNOTS

the problem isn't you its me, i know, i can tell. i've seen it time after time, and i'll push you away. i get so afraid.

and i can't live without you now. i can't even live with myself.

i only have myself to blame.. but do you think we could start again?

POKE

poke at my iris, why can't i cry about this? maybe there is something that you know that i don't...
we adopt a brand new language, communicate through pursed lips....

i might never catch a mouse, and present it in my mouth, to make you feel you're with someone who deserves to be with you.

if you don't want to be with me just say and i will go.

well we can change our partners, this is a progressive dance but remember it was me who dragged you up to the sweaty floor.

well this has been a reel, i've got shin-splints and a stitch, but like a drunken night it's the best bits that are coloured in.

you should look through some old photos, i adored you in every one of those. if someone took a picture of us now they'd need to be told, that we had ever clung and tied a navy knot with arms at night.

but i hate when i feel like this, and i never hated you.
TO BE ALONE WITH YOU

i'd swim across lake michigan, i'd sell my shoes. i'd give my body to be back again, in the rest of the room.

to be alone with you.

you gave your body to the lonely, they took your clothes. you gave up a wife and a family, you gave your ghost.

to be alone with me.

i've never known a man who loved me.
WARMEST PART OF THE WINTER

come inside, you are hungry for sleep. you are the warmest part of the winter. when i was young i made a plan that i would never break myself.

lift the shade and let some light in the room, we don't see the sun anymore. i've been told i gave my soul to live my days for someone else.

tell me you love me but don't say it with words, i wanna feel your body around me. and twenty years of push and pull have left you searchin' for a name.

but maybe i have come here to die, to watch the life go out of my body. take apart the ugly days and you will never see the sun.
LITTLE HELL

what if i can't be all that you need me to be? we've got a good thing going, we have some promises to keep. but my addiction it can be such a detriment. please believe in this, my dear.. i am more than penitent.

what if everything's just the way that it will be? could it be that i am meant to cause you all this grief? my warships are lying off the coast of your delicate heart. and my aim is steady and true, as it's been right from the start.

there's a degree of difficulty in dealing with me. from my haunted past comes the daunting task of living through memories. if we could just hang a mirror on the bedroom wall, stare into the past and forget it all..
WONDERWALL

all the roads we have to walk are winding, and all the lights that lead us there are blinding. there are many things that i would like to say to you, but i don't know how.

'cause maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me
and after all, you're my wonderwall

by now you shoulda realised what you've gotta do
i don't believe that anybody feels the way i do about you now.
ALWAYS IN YOUR HEAD

let yourself down, let yourself down, pull yourself together. always afraid of choices that you make, but you and i know better. i have seen the spark, i have seen the spark still alive inside your heart. i have seen the fire, i have seen the fire at the heart of your desire.

i am always in your head, always in your head, you've gotta let me go. let me go.

waiting on a sign, for the heavens to align, waiting on an answer - what are you waiting for?

lie to your friends and foes, lie when you're on your own, till the lie is all that matters. all the cons and pros, will not support the weight of your regrets when you grow old.

now is not the time to be afraid, or the time to run away, or the time to hide your face under those covers. fear is a prison cell and you know damn well that if you listen to him whisper he'll ride your coat tails all the way down to the bottom.

keep holding on, and hold your head high
it's not the end if it's not all alright.
COLD IS THE NIGHT

cold is the night without you here, just your absence ringing in my ears. hard is the heart that feels no fear. without the bad the good disappears.

long is the road that leads me home, and longer still when i walk alone. bitter is the thought of all that time, spent searching for something i'll never find.

take this burden away from me, and bury it before it buries me.

many are the days i've wanted to cease, lay myself down and find some relief. heavy is the head that gets no sleep. we carry our lives around in our memories.

take away this apathy, and bury it before it buries me.

steady is the hand that's come to terms, with the lessons it has had to learn. i've seen the things that i must do, but lord, this road is meant for two. so i'm waiting here for you.

take my hand and set me free, take my burdens and bury them deep. take my burden away from me, and bury it before, bury it before, bury it before it buries me.